Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
Too tired to do the dishes so I made mac and cheese in a teapot. There's still some left if you want some...
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
Apple should advertise that their phones are puke-proof. They would appeal to a whole new audience.
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
Dear Andy-the problem is not that I slept with your girlfriend, it's that you didn't know she's a lesbian.
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