ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
When my alarm went off, he rolled over and asked me: Bacon or dick? Yes, I will see him again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
I'm getting married
To pizza
We kinda got asked to leave the strip club and on the way out, you fell again. When you finally got up we got a standing ovation from the girls behind the bar and you took a bow. It was awesome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
Randomize