I'm pounding a vodka drink as we speak to make her interesting
I'm calling you out on twitter if you don't come over right now.
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
when i got to my bed there was a handwritten note that said "wash the sheets." sleeping on the couch.
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
Hey, scratch that. I've shit 8 times today. I don't have the energy to get laid so I cancelled my date.
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
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