he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
Today's weekday brunch started at 2pm, and consisted of $7 of sandwich and $50 of cocktails. Also, I hustled the bartender for about $3 playing nickel poker, but he may have been letting me win. Either way, he didn't get into my pants.
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
Sara can't come to the phone right now. She's currently having an in-depth conversation with a flower pot.
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
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