We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
just took my abortion antibiotic with my martini. i no longer wonder how i got into this situation.
best line ever after sex today..."wow, that was a porn-star sized load"
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
Randomize
