im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
Randomize
