The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
I recommend you throw your keys as far as you can in one direction, your phone as far as you can in the opposite direction, and hold on.
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
Definitely just found that pen in the microwave. What the fuck.
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
Randomize
