i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
At least a dozen asian tourists will be showing their friends pictures of me peeing off of Hoover Dam with a cop pointing his gun at me when they get home. I worry about the impact on their children.
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
The "don't have sex with him again" alerts you set on my phone just started going off.
Good. "Seriously, don't do it" should start in about five minutes.
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
I should have known when she mixed malibu and V8. It smelled just like tanning oil and when she drank it she said "Oh well, not the first time."
Randomize
