Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
You came out of the bathroom, said "I'M DRUNK BUT I REMEMBERED TO WASH MY HANDS!" and then insisted that she smell them.
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
I need to wash the frat house off of me
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
Randomize
