3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
my mom walked in on me smoking weed alone, listening to the eagles, and just staring at the river. she totally knew.
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
Randomize