Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
This house was built for laser tag.
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ...
I don't know if your celebrity crush has ever asked you for nudes, but it's fucking awesome
I feel like emojis are just meant for explaining sex without using words to make anyone uncomfortable. It's a true gift
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
Randomize