is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
I wish life had little blips of pornography
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
Okay, guy from work I want to fuck just told me he liked the font on my PowerPoint presentation. It is so on.
Make me proud, climb that corporate ladder.
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
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