doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
These are the things that make me so grateful... that I slept with your sister instead.
You woke up, looked straight at me and screamed "fuck barbara streisand!" and passed out again
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
Randomize
