I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
I just tried to eat one of my ear plugs, thinking it was a cheese curl. I need it to be break RIGHT NOW.
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
I called her 20 times. Apparently she went home to do MORE shots before bed. Didnt miss me until this morning. WHO FORGETS THEIR HIGHSCHOOL SISTER AT A FRAT?
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
I keep track of what day of the week it is by my recent destinations on my nav system. \nRight now it's: booty call, bar, booty call, brunch, bar, church so that must mean we are getting close to Sunday when we start the rotation all over again.
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
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