I think I died a long time ago.
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
My mom just walked in and she was like "Who ate all of the cheese?" and all I could think of was you trying to become a human taco
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
I feel like emojis are just meant for explaining sex without using words to make anyone uncomfortable. It's a true gift
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
Randomize