what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
The ice cream man just told me to use protection.
I'm trying not to drink. I may fall down if I move. This is bad. I had everclear before the bar. Oh no. Oh no. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
Randomize
