tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
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his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
I was just tryna bring you beer girl. I should've known you'd be shirtless though
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
K. The dog and I are outside. The Uber driver said "I hope he fucks the shit out of you"
They sent him a photo of me smoking a bong whilst wearing the dinosaur head. I think that's the last we hear of his nonsmoking fitness freak ass 🤷🏼♀️
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
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