i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
I just got a nosebleed on a date at the cheesecake factory...
just run out of the bathroom with blood gushing down your face and scream "ITS IN THE CHEESECAKE!!!!!"
He kept humping my leg and whispering "dont worry, thats my phone not my penis"
URGENT INPUT I'm at a renesance fair after party and I'm 100% lined up to fuck their sword swallower OR their contortionist. Dont say both - which direction doth I roll?
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
So, I ran into Garrett last night in the laundry room.
Oh really? First post break-up run in. How'd it go? Awkward?
Um. We had sex on a washing machine.
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
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