hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
she asked me if I wanted a handjob on the haunted mansion ride at Disney. was I suposed to say no?
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
You know it's a good weekend when you wake up on Sunday questioning your sexuality.
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
Randomize
