You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
so my aunt is sitting on the couch, eating a brownie and watching the biggest loser saying how it's not that hard to eat healthy
man i love america
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
Little boy scout stared at me with judgmental looks while I bought 3 bottles of liquor but refused to buy popcorn from him
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
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