just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
I know its hard to believe that I'm already drunk at 12 p.m. but I am, so dont call me asking to go to the gym.
Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
I didn't notice because vodka
When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."
I'm sitting alone in a bar pretending to watch football because I don't know where the liquor store is around here and I'll be god damned I'm going to be sober on my day off.
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
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