Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
If I had a nickel for every time somebody called me a bad person I would have enough money to check into rehab
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
I just remembered that last night I seriously contemplated swallowing the cap to my toothpaste
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
Randomize
