I like to think it a success when the cops are called
Literally getting boned by my flask right now. I didn't really think about this whole sneaking past security in a skin tight dress.
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
Wanna buy a dildo with me during your lunch break tomorrow?
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
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