On my way home i need to take a massive dump and couldn't wait.
I saw a seagull swallow a hot-dog whole today, it reminded me of you.
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
Me and this random chick had a conversation about how to save the world. 2 words: Dance. Battles. I love drunk heart to hearts in bar bathrooms.
I stirred my drink with a butcher knife. His roomate keeps giving me dirty looks
Like what do you want from me
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
I was having a dream that I was swimming in a pool filled with melted chocolate but woke up to find I had poured chocolate milk all over my body
Randomize
