Theres puke in my trash can and spilled beer next to my bed... come get your girlfriend
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
Come see our sink grown plant.
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
Woke up and there was a kayak in the pool. Are you alive?
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
Randomize
