so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
Did you really lure me out of the bar with a blond holding a dunkin donuts bag? Well played sir, well played.
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
I got a lap dance last night from a girl while I was wearing a Captian America onsie. My life does not suck.
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
I just bought two cartons of ice cream, 5 boxes of mac and cheese and a bridal magazine. Don't judge me.
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