hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
Omg just had weirdest best cab advice situation ever. I kissed the cabbies hand as I was leaving like he was the pope and cried
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
doc says my ankle might be broken, they're going to do xrays. He asked me what happened and I told him if he could find out that would be great.
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
Randomize