there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
I asked him to make me two boxes of macaroni and cheese. That's like eight servings. How did I think that was an okay amount.
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
Dreamt I had my own personal vibrator rep, who made house calls. I earned an upgrade to an electric model, since I was burning through batteries. That's it. Time for a bf.
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
Literally been in their house 5 minutes and I've projectile vomited all over the bathroom wall. The dog licked it up though so I think it's cool.
Randomize
