Dear tim. Christina farted and it smells like kid roses.
the condom got lost in my hair
You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
you came in and threw goldfish on our blue carpet and screamed SWIM BITCHES and then made me drink a best friends potion with you
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
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