chick flicks and taylor swift songs are like porn for desperate singles
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
I saved him in my phone as "Well-Hung Burrito Savior." I love Taco Tuesday.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
Is this like a preordered booty call?
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
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