Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
why did i save someone in my phone as corn dildo?
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
After I just paid $211 for my hair to be dyed and cut this guy at the bar said "I know you died your hair with koolaid, but I'd still fuck the shit out of you"
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
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