2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
I woke up to find his roommate face down on the couch with no pants on, with a sticky note that said "was lost but now am found"
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
I am eating a fluff-a-nutter sandwich at the gym right now. I brought vodka too.
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
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