just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
Honestly, this social distancing bullshit is giving me a good excuse for drinking alone.
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