Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
my bedside table was not meant to hold this many beer bottles.
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
future reference: when you get a text that says "WARNING: EXPLICIT PHOTOS BEING DELIVERED. VIEWERS DISCRETION IS ADVISED." you always open the attached picture.
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
I yelled at the cab driver to slow down because my unborn children live here, and pointed to my uterus. I think my message was lost in translation though because he immediately offered me his card...
Cancelling your gym membership calls for alcohol.
Randomize
