perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
It's really awkward to greet the pastor when I know I've licked chocolate syrup off his daughter's chest.
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
And I feel like pitchers of margaritas accidentally make it down your throat a lot.
I mean, the lady at the Mexican restaurant insisted. She said she would win a prize if she sold another pitcher before noon. And plus I got to wear a sombrero
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
Why is the clock ticking so loud? Now I know how Captain Hook feels.
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
You did what with his pubic hair?
Randomize
