Soap is not a condiment
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
These 25 Women First Experienced Sexual Harassment At A Shocking Age
The jerky fairy visited my fridge. It's glorious.
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
I ripped my favorite jeans crossing that fence
It's an upgrade! I didn;t even have to unzip my pants to pee!
23 Absolutely Despicable Things That People Have Actually Done
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
Is it a coincidence that the reminder on my phone to take my birth control is "I'm ready to party" from Bridesmaids?
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes