maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
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all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
27 People Confess Their Proudest Fap
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?