if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.