I wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commercials.
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
The bartender has no bra and is giving out free shots. Call mom I'm getting married.
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
Randomize
