READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
Just cropdusted the office
Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
I just remembered I opened the taxi door when I was at a red light last night and puked. And then when I was done I closed the door and told him he may proceed with caution.
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
I'm surprised I haven't crapped out a leprechaun, I'm so hungover
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
Is there an "I fucked your brother" emoji?
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
Randomize
