mark looks like s**t tonight! thank da lawd we broke up!
it's mark...i'm guessing you didn't mean to send that to me...
Why did I wake up with "How to masturbate" on my youtube search bar?
You told us you forgot how, and started to cry.
he left me a 6 minute video of him peeling a clementine listening to justin bieber
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
I tried to lock you in the bathroom stall because you were too drunk. But you escaped from underneath, I gave up
I can't be 100% sure of this but I think tonight was the first time I told a middle aged woman holding a baby to go fuck herself
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
Randomize