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• (203): View more from Connecticut

  my mom hid the smirnoff from me. this is the most fucked up game of hide and seek EVER

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• (860): View more from Connecticut

  Did you wake up with "jello shots" stamped on your hand too?

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• (917): View more from New York City

  shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom

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• (773): View more from Illinois

  At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?

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  27 Unforgettable Hookup Texts

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• (603): View more from New Hampshire

  Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.

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• (913): View more from Kansas

  The moment you ate chicken nuggets out of your purse you were my hero.

  (816): View more from Missouri

  Where the hell did i get chicken nuggets from

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• (918): View more from Oklahoma

  That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.

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• (360): View more from Washington

  Some drunk guy thought my knee scooter was the sexiest thing he's ever seen. He then proceeded to ask me about duck hunting and decoys...

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• (480): View more from Arizona

  Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.

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• 

  19 Groupies Confess What It’s Really Like To Hook Up With Famous Rockstars

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• (780): View more from Alberta, CA

  Woke up this morning with an extra $35 and someone else's ATM receipt. How much did I drink last night?

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• (503): View more from Oregon

  The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.

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• (815): View more from Illinois

  Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back

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• (970): View more from Colorado

  OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID

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• (973): View more from New Jersey

  Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.

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• (650): View more from California

  Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.

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