You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
Writing a love song to planned parenthood. what rhymes with "don't have AIDS"
You know, be my cock's hype man.
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
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