Duuuude. Everything is so brilliant right now. This frosting is freaking orgasmic.
It's vanilla, man. Accept no substitutes. There are so many t's in that word.
You force fed me chocolate chips and avocados for 3 hours and kept asking me about my trip to sweden when I was 4.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
She was drunk and naked on our couch, sweating and masterbating to SNL. We made eye contact and she didn't even stop. It's new-roommate-o-clock
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
It's 3 am and I'm buying cat food and batteries for my vibrator. Good thing I shaved my legs for this.
Just had an oven catch fire while I was balls deep. Fire department came, I did not.
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
Randomize
