sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
She said she didn't have time to shave "there"
Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster.
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
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do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
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We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.