im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
She carried my bag of puke down the aisle and the flight attendant wouldn't move the beverage cart so she put the puke bag in the flight attendant's face and said "I have a bag of sickness!" I've never seen a cart move that fast.
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
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Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
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