question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
you're not a real person. you're actually just like a box of wine that can talk
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
Can't promise anything, there's vodka in my thermos
Of course I lose my iPhone but still manage to hold on to the ruler for my dirty teacher costume
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
the gays at disneyland are vicious
Henceforth: booty calls will now be referred to as "deliveries of anatomy". That is all.
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
Randomize
