shes about as inviting as chlamydia
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
he was chasing shots of soco with fistfuls of my birthday cake
It's always a surprise to see what songs I shazamed and downloaded last night while we were drunk at the bar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
I bought a police grade breathalyzer on ebay at 4:37 am. At least I'm a responsible drunk.
What is a reasonable amount of condoms to keep in my condom wallet without it being creepy that I have too many?
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
well his attempt to make a white russian with instant coffee, gone off milk, and that weird probably illegal vodka we bought the other day isnt going well
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
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