What time are you coming? Can you stop and get mouse traps and trojans?
You have mice?
no why?
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
Also, just had a student offer to sell me Xanax. Want some? Just for like a rainy day. Or our memorial day shitshow. Or just another Wednesday night.
You screamed 'no, YOU put some pants on' at a cop. I pretended not to know you.
say penis size is all related to how funny you are and then tell a feminist joke. if she laughs, you got double points, if she slaps you, she probably wasn't going to sleep with you anyway
You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
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