The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
I'd bet your vomit would be flammable at this point. Can I try to light it?
We wouldn't be friends if you didn't.
Yoga may not b such a good idea for me today. My liver is obviously in cahoots with my colon to pay me back for the past 24 days of misuse . Downward dog could have catastrophic consequences.
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
My autocorrect won't finish pterodactyl for me and I'm feeling personally attacked.
Randomize
