Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
trust me, you don't know shame until you're in a peacock costume getting CPR by random dudes
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
Randomize
