i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
I walked into his living room and saw him watching the play-offs while eating tomato paste out of the can with a bottle of wine. I'm telling you to stop talking to him. now.
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
You fuck like a mechanic. That is the universe telling you that is your true calling. Take this as a sign.
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
Intelligence report: the hot sister called you gross, the sweet sister says you're dumb, and the smart sister says all the other men she knows would have to die for her to hook up with you.
Randomize
