Freshman orientation day on campus. Dear diary, JACKPOT.
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
Randomize
