Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
Driving to get a preg test with my ex, wearing my unicorn hat
You are so not ready for motherhood
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
they set my background as his mugshot to remind me "having a big penis won't be a valid excuse in a court room."
I have six new people in my phone that I don't remember adding. One of them is "Bourbon Yeah." Successful evening?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Found some boxer briefs on my patio table this morning surrounded by a case worth of empties. Starting to remember why I have rugburn and a sore asshole.
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
Randomize